Today I met with my current co-facilitators and told them about my experiences from Tuesday and asked for support when it comes to calling on people. Because the workshop is about race, undoing racism, and about being a good ally, my colleague drew parallels between those who neglect the needs of people of color to those who neglect the needs of people with dis/abilities: if the former is engaging in passive racism, then the latter would be engaging in passive ablism.
"I don't see it that way," I said, "because they are not doing that thing thing to me." And we moved on.
As I write this 12 hours later, I kind of disagree with the me that said that 12 hours ago. If someone doesn't support me once, or twice, or a few times, sure, that's just not knowing what I need. But if I tell them again and again, and they continue to not support me, then that is neglect and it's ablism. Passive, perhaps, unless they really have it in for me.
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